♥ i close my eyes and the flashback starts;

Monday, August 21, 2006

i guess my cousin taught me a lot more than what can ever be said.
the power of cousins=)
mutual sentiments.
thank you for showing me.
wanted to study right?!
then we spent our hours yakking.
and going like OMG when we do the same things
i swear it's like we share telepathy or sth.
honestly.
and all along,we thought we stood alone..

just when i was bathing like 10 mins ago
i was filled w this feeling of resolution, determination and bursting spurt of energy
why the hell am i wasting my time?
im stupid.
dumb.
retarded.
i know, right?
so anw then while bathing i decided:
w/o reciprocation,
im being an idiot.
so now i officially declare my not being an idiot.
why continue wasting my time, right?
yeaahhh...i thought so too..
ok SETTLED.

im done for the day.=)

so i guess REALLY NOW, right here right now
this is where it all ends.

you showed me im wasting my time.

a closure finally.
and the curtains open.
the stage is bare.
it has always been.
somehow i used to imagine the props..
that DONT exist,
right from the start.

p.s. im not self deluding nor lying nor trying to convince myself.honestly
somehow everything sorted itself out
in the mere space of hours.
how did that happen?!
a miracle
i was always supposed to reach here.
i GUESS.
but i DETOURED.

Y8:15 PM